So I’m writing this post in Internet Explorer and cursing the fact that it doesn’t have Safari’s handy-dandy way of resizing all text boxes. Unfortunately, when I did switch to Safari it froze and crashed every chance it got. This has reinforced my already unshakable theory that Steve Jobbs’s master plan is to make us hate PCs by creating faulty software for them. Instead we should be hating Apple, but I digress.

The clock continues and as you can see from the pictures below we’re in the penultimate part of this time-consuming trip through the creation of cardboard clocks. First, we placed the face on the clock. Then ran together the gears allowing for some photography that looks like the first trailer for “watchmen.” The idea is that the weights turn the gears and the pendulum slows them down so it can only move a click at a time. (See Below)

Sorry if you haven’t been building the clock all along those photos are probably meaningless. But suffice it to say the whole thing is one big attempt of weight vs. lever. Then you add in some friction as you can see the gears ouside the clock and you have something that is geared perfectly on a 60:1 ratio. (Because in an hour is 60 minutes duh). Now for part four what you have to look forward to is more sanding and lacquering followed by my realization that I need to find 2.5 pound weights that don’t cost 40$ for my clock to work. Oh…for you photography nuts, I turned down the exposure to make the cardboard look more menacing. Feast your eyes.

Of course the espresso nuts out htere want to see exactly what kind of foam art I’ve been up to lately. You’ll all be pleased to hear that my foam art has improved greatly. Just look at these beauties.

Feast your eyes…while it may look to the untutored layman that I have just made a blob or better yet a Rorschach test, it just means you don’t know your science. The one on the left is carefully crafted to resemble a fraudulent embryo sketch by Ernest Haeckel. Haeckel, a scientific fraud who manufactured images as evidence of evolution, has been discredited but he still provides inspiration for my latte art.

The other one quite obviously is an angel folding one of its wings…ok if you bought that then I’m getting better at my own brand of fraudulent claims, but the resemblance is uncanny isn’t it? Well that about wraps it up for today, but wait! It is now time to for previews.

Coming Soon to a Blog Near You:

• The clock gets finished. Perhaps some more foam art that looks like freaks of Nature.
• I’ve always wanted…to play chess like Mikhail Tal: If you don’t know who Tal is, he’s a Latvian Chess grandmaster who’s considered the best attacking grandmaster of all time. (No Latvia is not just a psuedo-slavic country in a Louis Sachar book where Madame Zeroni lives. I thought that too until I looked it up).
• Russell’s interpretation of your baby names.
• And…the beginning of the fun game of why I am healthy (Taught through the innovative game…Pick Russ’s Shopping Cart).

So the process of building the clock is continuing. Now that the outside frame is done the work has turned into the slow process of creating the gears and properly isntalling them. As you can see in the picture below:

Each of the guears has to be stacked and glued. Once they’re finished, if you want the clock to last awhile, the directions say to sand and lacquer the edges of the gears. In my case sanding, because I was trying to sand cardboard. only made everything worse so I may hold off on having a long lasting clock and just build the darn thing.

This is the main winder of the clock. You can’t see all the detail in this photo, but it consists of a ratcheting wheel that can only turn clockwise. The weights are attatched to hooks that pull the weight counterclockwise. The idea is you wind the clock by turning the smaller wheel to the right and when the weight pulls down on the strings it enages the main gear turning the wheel left. Cool stuff huh? As for the main body of the clock. The pendulum and main housing have been built, making the only project installation of the gears as seen below.

So as you can see the main pendulum is now finished. Of course, I haven’t just spent all my time doing this, the road to espresso fineness continues. Take a look at some of the espresso art below.

The images are arranged chronologically. I’ll probably youtube some espresso art videos this afternoon. When I do I’ll post the link so you can learn what I’m learning. In the meantime. Keep hopes up and enjoy your projects .

So I can still remember the first time I watched the movie “The Prestige” and how I was fascinated that Christian Bale had a secret code that could only be unlocked by a secret phrase. As it turns out making a cryptogram was easier than I thought. Committing it to memory is something I still have yet to master. I’m going to teach you the easiest of the complicated cryptograms (since you want it to be complicated enough that people won’t be able to break it). Using this you can take a keyword and make a cypher that will be pretty difficult to crack.

Most cyphers are substitution based, but these fall to codebreakers because the amount a letter is used can be a factor in what it is substituted for. This cypher goes a bit further and shifts the substitution alphabet every letter and repeats after every three or four switches. Here’s the trick, you pick a code phrase (we’ll use four letters for our practice code) and each letter you begin the substitution alphabet with a letter of the code phrase. For example the code phrase test would use something like this.

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

and your substitution alphabet would look like this

T U V W X Y Z A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S

i’ll let you fill in the rest but your substitution alphabet for the next letter would begin with “E” and then “S” and so forth. Spaces are ignored for sake of simplicity. Also, instead of using the T substitution twice at the beginning and end, just use it once (as if the code phrase were TES). Try writing your own passages in code. Or try translating the phrase below.

BJ QHY LKEFLPSMIV MLAL CGN AENX XGG FYUA XAFI

Or for those of you who think you can crack my personal code. Try the three word phrase below.

MNN MAU LFGTEF

For those of you who think that this code isn’t secret enough you can always code a phrase and then run a completely new cypher with an entirely new code phrase. This will make the code almost unbreakable, but it takes a lot more time and is a lot more prone to mistake. So…to each his own, enjoy!

So we’re approaching the end of the first week and I’ve cracked open the clock model. Immediately I realized I’d gotten more than I’d bargained for. I spent time building models as I grew up, but I usually broke the darn things before I ever got anywhere. The curse of poor dexterity and no patience. For thos of you who haven’t seen anything like this before. What you’re looking at is a box filled with cardboard sheets that require precise handing to cut each out without breaking it. Of course if you botch one gear the whole thing doesn’t work.

This clock required me to remove each and every individual piece of cardboard and then assemble, sand, and lacquer each of the gears. Finally, you get to actually put the clock together.  By the end of the first day I had barely gotten through a third of detaching the pieces. Then, I had to use scraps of post-it to ensure that no pieces were lost.

This is about half the pieces and as you can see it already has become a huge nightmare. I am now eating my meals on the far edge of my table because the pieces swarmed everything. Additionally, my coffee table  been cleared and even more pieces have filled that area. All told the are 456 pieces to this model clock and I am proud report that I don’t believe I have lost any one of the.

On the offhand chance that I’m wrong in that prediction I will post another blog entry entirel in wingdings and you can substitute whatever expletives you feel appropriate.

Still, just because I’m working on one project doesn’t mean I have to neglect others. The epresso has been flowing like clockwork each morning as I plan on learning how to do espresso art. First, things first,I need to master foaming milk in the first place. The coffee currently in use is Dillons coffee. Anyone who is familiar with my family know that we prefer Darte’ coffee, but  last thing any aspiring artist wants to do is spent 2,000 dollars on oil paints used by michelangelo while they’re ability would allow them to get the same potential from $2 finger paints. Notice the nice creme onop of the coffee though, that makes the foam art much easier I’m told.

And of course the foam art itself. Note that I use the term “art” rather loosely in this case. This is my best effort at a blob. Actually it was supposed to be a “rosette” but fate intervened. Note also the particularly poor foam quality. That is what happens when you don’t clack and swirl (yes clack and swirl is an artistic term. It is currently in use by at least one barista).

On the irony of the art I’ve chosen I think everyone should find it intersting that one who makes coffee is a barista, one who practices law is a barrister. Sexism anyone? Still I aim to become the world’s first barista barrister. So everyone wish me luck until then.

Until next time I have more sanding and lacquering to do. Upcoming events include salsa lessons which I have learned start in february so stay tuned.

Well I’m going to have my first post up by the weekend and I thought I’d lead into it by giving an overview of how this section of the site will work.

There are many things that people go through life wishing they could do (dance like Michael Jackson, paint like Titian, run parkour like that guy in James Bond, play chess like Mikhail Tal etc.) but most people either don’t have the drive to do what is necessary to get there or they don’t know how.

There is a general assumption in the world that we are gifted to do certain things while others we might as well not even try. Under this illusion people have put their dreams on hold until they just fill their life with regret. I believe that anything is possible to learn through hard work, perseverance, and because I’m a Christian I attribute all end success (and middle success and success in general) to the blessing of God. However, if you’re not a Christian don’t worry non-Christians do amazing things all the time so clearly if I’m right and God grants success than he doesn’t do it along religious lines .

The first thing about teaching yourself anything is that you need to be patient and develop necessary skills before you do anything big. I asked my sister how she learned to draw so well and she told me that she had spent hours drawing hands or eyes. When you endeavour to learn something you must start with the basics. Learn the openings in chess before you mimic a style, learn the motions and basic movements for crossfit and parkour before you actually try leaping to buildings.  Most people end up quitting at this stage, because they want the end result of what they’re learning immediately. So don’t be afraid to spend months or even years learning the basics or fundamental skills. Learn to love practice, you’ll be doing a lot of it unless you don’t want anything.

Next, don’t be afraid to learn by reading or watching videos. Everyone learn differently and at almost all phases of a new project someone knows how to do something better. Look online for resources or use my two favorite places of learning: the oracle (wikipedia), and the library. The important thing is to make sure you’re learning somehow.

Finally, a note on talent. Everyone has different gifts and it is possible that there are people a lot more talented than you are in your new project. Ask them for help, they are one of the best ways of learning. Whatever you do, don’t let their talent discourage you. When Bruce Pandolfini met Josh Waitzkin I’m sure Pandolfini could have trounced him at chess. So respect talent and be thankful you have it, but don’t get discouraged as you don’t.

I come from a long line of teachers and if you can teach other people you can teach yourself. As you read along with my adventures I’ll try to put down different teaching methods I use. That is one of my talents: I have a good head for creating systems of learning and I’ll be exercising that talent to the utmost in the coming months. So now, sit back enjoy the ride and let’s start doing some obscure crap.